 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
||||
  Many of us have had the feeling that something wonderful was about to happen, that life was full of promise and that we would play an important part in making the world a better place. This passion and idealism blossoms during adolescence as we look at the world with completely new eyes. There are three facets of the adolescent I would like to bring up that are not ordinarily mentioned. The first of these characteristics-idealism-starts around age eleven, but hits an acute level by about fifteen. They are acutely, painfully idealistic. This is the age when suddenly our children start dropping behind us on the street; they don't want to walk right with us. For years my children looked up to me as though I were God; I liked that very much. And suddenly they hit this certain age and they're looking at the old man and noticing he has dandruff, he's kind of bald, kind of small, and not so much after all. In schools, our little children march in beautifully, say good morning teacher, and they're loving and obedient and so on and all of a sudden they hit this age and they're looking at the teacher and they say, what do you know; they're challenging the teacher every minute. The teacher is offended by this, threatened by it. What's going on? Well, it's nothing of their own doing. They're looking at the world through a prism, with a new perspective, and they're looking for a model that will match their idealism. Who are their models? Pop stars, rock stars, movie stars, sport stars, the Donald Trumps, at best maybe the political stars, and so on: these are their models. On every hand-and I say this without indictment-the models betray what the young person is looking for. In place of the idealism comes despair, a loss of hope of finding a model, cynicism, anger, frustration, and the adoption of models who represent the exact opposite to what they're really after. And this comes about from their feelings of futility and helplessness: they'll never find what they really want. So they of choose anti-heroes. Instead of those who measure up to the virtue and uprightness that they felt at age eleven, they pick the punk star who says don't kill me I'm already dead. That's what they wear on their t-shirts, don't kill me I'm already dead. They have to be tough, sophisticated, and cynical, to deny their idealism. Why must they deny it so vigorously? They deny vigorously because it's too painful. Their loss of idealism is too painful to them so they pick anti-models and, of course, society is anxious to provide those for a price. Billions of dollars are made from the frustration and rage of young people. Now let's take the second thing about the adolescent, which will start up somewhere around fourteen or fifteen and by sixteen is so painful that it is literally a weight in a person's life. I call this the great expectation, is the feeling that something tremendous is supposed to happen and supposed to happen right now. Young people wait for it instant by instant. I spoke about this with a radio announcer, one of these tough guys who batters around his guests and plays the tough role. I asked if he could remember being an adolescent and feeling that something tremendous was supposed to happen in his life. He said, "What do you mean remember it? I've been waiting for it all my life and it hasn't happened yet, I don't think it ever will." He continued, "I thought every corner I turned it was going to happen; every time I went up over a little hill it was going to happen and it never did." I love that; this feeling of great expectation really speaks for us all. Everyone knows the constant anticipation that something is supposed to happen. The third issue is the feeling of hidden greatness as a person. Hidden greatness. At sixteen I was working a full-time civil service job; I was quite an anonymous little person but I was just exploding with hugeness inside. I completely fooled myself. I used to think that even though I'm walking down the street a complete unknown, if they-you know how teenagers always refer to "they"-just knew who I really was they'd all stand back and make way for me. But I didn't know what constituted this greatness myself or how I was ever going to let everyone know about it. Doesn't that register with us all during that teenage period? This feeling of secret hidden uniqueness; that feeling that nothing like me could have ever happened before? Marianne Diamond says, "Well if you challenge the brain enough, it will continue to develop throughout life," but all of this is on a different level than we talked about before. We're back to the three levels of the brain. I must call this hypothetical, even though I know it's not. The first fifteen years have been devoted to coming into dominion over this whole physical process and all learning that has taken place has related to this, and rightly so. Then by fifteen sexuality has appeared and what is sexuality all about? |
||||
|
||||
